


i'm afraid i won't wake up from this

by ok_but_first_tea



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Anxiety, Dreams, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Nightmares?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-19
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-23 02:01:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17071358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ok_but_first_tea/pseuds/ok_but_first_tea
Summary: “Did I-” He began. “I didn’t wake you up, right?”Taako smiled. “Nah dog, Lup’s snoring. I figured you might have some room left for your ol’ pal Taako.”Magnus squinted at him. “You know I also snore.”Taako shrugged and looked away.“Aww.” Magnus said, walking over to sit on the edge of the bed. “You care about me.”





	i'm afraid i won't wake up from this

**Author's Note:**

> I would like yall to know that the working title of this fic was "WAKE ME UP(wake me up insiiide", but I loved you enough that i didn't make that the title.  
> Either way, don't do what im doing and write/read this fic instead of sleeping. (i imagine you wont have as much trouble with the not-writing part of that ;P)

Magnus wasn’t the type to sleep uneasily, in any sort of occasion. But this was a special one. 

It was an occasion where Magnus couldn’t sleep, or couldn’t sleep anymore, and that made it special. 

It was also majorly annoying Taako, who had trouble sleeping in even the best of occasions. Taako, who had elven ears, and thus could hear Magnus stomping up and down the room next to him all night. 

At least, Taako blamed it on his ears. Lup, who had the exact same ears as he did, was sleeping peacefully next to him. 

Taako had tried to shake her awake a few hours back to ask if she thought he should go check on Magnus, but Lup had only grumbled and said that Taako “should go the fuck back to sleep” and that “seriously nothing is on fire, chonk out babe”. Or at least that’s what Taako heard. 

Most people who would have heard something more like “shhhtak ghnnghhng Slep.” and “Nothsfy’r, Ch’k baeh”, but Taako had had a lifetime (and more) of training in Sleepy Lup Speak.

Of course, this only meant that Taako had now spend the last few hours since that something actually was on fire; A possibility he hadn’t previously considered. 

Everytime Magnus’s footsteps echoed into his ears, Taako shook awake in fear. Maybe this- maybe this time something was Actually Up. 

Taako could handle a lot, but at some point, he was done. The next time he heard Magnus stumble around, Taako got up. 

He didn’t knock at the door before throwing it open and letting himself fall face first into Magnus’s bed. It smelled… Magnus-y. 

“H-hail and well met.” Magnus said in the high, surprised voice of someone who didn’t expect to speak any time soon. Immediately after, Magnus winced and tried to overcompensate by making his voice go real low. “I- I mean, Whaddup.” 

Taako, still with his face planted firmly into the pillow, snorted. He turned his head to look at Magnus. 

“What?” Magnus said. 

“I don’t know,  _ dude. _ I’m not the one not in bed at like, fuckass in the morning.” With that Taako scooted to the side a little, to make room for Magnus. It wouldn’t be enough room for Magnus but Taako considered the thought to be what mattered. 

Magnus rubbed the inside of his arm. 

“Did I-” He began. “I didn’t wake you up, right?” 

Taako smiled. “Nah dog, Lup’s snoring. I figured you might have some room left for your ol’ pal Taako.” 

Magnus squinted at him. “You know I also snore.” 

Taako shrugged and looked away.    
“Aww.” Magnus said, walking over to sit on the edge of the bed. “You care about me.”    
“Psss. As if.” 

“You were having  _ emotions.” _ Magnus wiggles his fingers at the last word. 

“My emotion is tired. You’re gonna sleep or what?” 

Magnus laughed. “Yeah, alright. Scoot over.” 

Taako did not get the chance to scoot over before Magnus had hurled him through the air (or what feeled to Taako as if) and, a few seconds later, somehow positioned them on the tiny bed without any of Taako’s input. 

Taako blushed. He wasn’t really into Magnus but hot damn, if he wasn’t still gay as shit. He was also very comfortable. And warm. 

Taako settled his face into the crook of Magnus neck and let his eyes fall shut.    
“Night Mags.” 

“Goodnight Taako.” Magnus chest rumbled as he spoke. “...Hey Taako? Thanks.”    
“Shut up.” 

“Yeah okay.” 

Magnus closed his eyes. 

Then he opened them again. And then he closed them again. He tried counting Taako’s breaths, but after a while he’d found his eyes to be tracing the lines on his ceiling. 

Magnus sighed, wiggled a little to get comfortable, and then sighed again. 

Having Taako near helped. But it didn’t solve the problem. Or it might have if Magnus knew what the problem was, and he didn’t. Sort of. 

“Fine.” Taako said. “Fine!” He said, a bit more forcefully this time. 

Taako cast silence and leaned his elbows on Magnus chest to look at him. 

“We’re talking about feelings now,” Taako said. He didn’t say it loudly, but compared to the silence the night had asked of them, if felt like thunder.    
Magnus looked away. 

“I don’t know wha-”    
“Nuhuh.” Taako interrupted. “You can’t do that to me. I hate this and you know it. Don’t make me be nice to you.” 

Taako folded his arms over Magnus chest and settled his chin on them to squint up and Magnus. 

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Magnus said. Taako softened a little a that. 

“You just start talking and we’ll figure something out together, okay?” He said. Which was a lot more kindness than Taako usually showed him in the catastrophic 20-odd years they’d been stuck in this tiny ship together. Magnus was at a bit of a loss what to do with it. 

It took him a while, but eventually he found some words that felt like they could fit through his throat. Magnus sighed. 

“You know, in dreams, when you see something and you want to walk to it, but you can’t- You can’t get there?” Magnus asked. “And when you try to go over there, your legs won’t move, and the floor feels like it’s made out of tar, or quicksand, or something? And you just can’t- you can’t-..” He didn’t wait for Taako’s confirmation to his question, but he did feel Taako take hold of his hand and link their fingers. It was comforting, and reassuring in a way. 

Someone was listening. 

Someone was  _ there _ .

“And whatever you were going to, it’s not even important or anything, but then you can’t move, or only move very slowly, and you panic and it feels like the most important thing in the world. And- and here’s the thing- you try really hard to get their, but the harder you try the slower you go, and you can’t breathe anymore and- and at some point you wake up because you kicked a wall or something, but I-.. I- Taako, I-..” 

Taako wiped some tears from Magnus’s eyes. He was channeling his inner Big Comforting Brother, who’d held Lup through many breakdowns. 

Magnus tried to catch his breath for a little while, under Taako’s more-gentle-than-usual guidance. Once Magnus felt adequately calmed down, he spoke up again. 

“I feel like I’ll never wake up from this one, Taako.”  His voice was raw, and cracked on the last syllable of his name. 

Taako squeezed his hand. Magnus was starting to think Taako wouldn’t respond when he spoke up. 

“You know, we will get out of this.” Taako said, quiet but his tone was steady and sure. “We will. It might.. It might take a while. But we’re not stuck, Maggie.” 

Taako took the time to look into Magnus’s eyes.    
“As long as we’re moving, we’re not stuck.” 

Magnus nodded. “Okay.”   
“Besides,” Taako said, “We see new shit every day. Maybe tomorrow will bring something better.” 

Magnus wet his lips and hesitated before asking: “And what if it doesn’t?” 

“Then we’ll deal with it as we always have: we work our butts off and celebrate surviving.” 

“And then?” Magnus asked, and Taako thought his voice could not possibly get any smaller. 

“And then we hope for a better fucking tomorrow.” Taako emphasize his point by poking his index finger into Magnus’s chest. 

Magnus smiled. It was a bit wobbly, but genuine so Taako accepted it. 

“Okay.” Magnus said. “Okay, I think I can do that.” 

Taako nodded once, decisively. “Fuck yeah, we can.” 

Magnus sighed deep, wiping the last of his tears away. 

“Thank you, Taako.” he said. 

“Nuhuh. We never had this conversation.”    
“I love you.” Magnus said and patted Taako’s head with a big hand. Taako squeaked. 

“Oh fuck yo-” He cut himself off by a yawning. 

Magnus chuckled at him. 

“Sleep well, Taako.”    
“Sleep well.” Taako grumbled and settled into Magnus’ chest once again. 

It wouldn’t be the last time they slept badly, and it definitely wouldn’t be the last time either of them had a bad day, or a bad year even. But they did work hard, and they celebrated small victories, until finally,  _ finally _ , a better morning came. 

They survived. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed that, if youre going through a hard time right now: It's okay. Let's breathe. You'll be okay.  
> If your life is kinda cool right now: Fuck yeah, let's celebrate that shit, WOOO!!!  
> Goodnight my dudes, ily


End file.
